Jelly Belly:
Baby cry, baby say
Mommy why you go away?
Baby cry, baby say
Belly warm place to stay
[Chorus]
Say mother may I crawl back into your womb?
Oh mother, womb so warm and snuggly too
Baby cry, baby say
Baby cold and baby gray
Maybe mommy spread her legs
Baby crawl back into today
Years go by, baby grow
He become man and he become old
Though baby still he feel so cold
Mother may I return home?
[Bridge]
Baby pack up bags he's coming home
Leave his wife and children all alone
Belly so warm and full of jelly, you know
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Diner Dionysus:
Paint it red
These dishes whisk along
In flights of fancy
Paint it red
The Diner Dionysus
Is entrancing
Enchanted in song
The waitresses salivate, so long
[Chorus]
Lift your glasses everyone
It's time for you to die
Let the hacking settle in
You'll find it's alright
Try the wine
Now isn't this divine
I'll have the fish 'n' chips
Try the wine
At Diner Dionysus
Come let's do the twist
The sweet songs beguile
The waitresses salivate and smile
[Bridge]
And the vines, they curl around
Pull the patrons underground
The nymphs of Nysa wake the stars
A river running red as dolphins charge you
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Bags:
Douche bags dress up like cowboys in Nashville
Douche bags are all that I see
Douche bags wear cowboy hats and drive pick-up trucks
To hide their latent homosexuality
Douche bags dress up like stoners in Nashville
Douche bags are all that I see
Douche bags grow shaggy hair and wear thrift store attire
And pretend they never took my lunch money
Now don't get me wrong cause I like wearing lipstick
Just as much as any guy in town
But what really makes me mean is when a douche bags won't come clean
It's alright to have a small penis
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Escape From The Nursing Home:
Wild little creature paint your face up black as night
You've got a wide-eyed fire burning bright inside you
Cry out and aloud up to the moon
A rowdy howling croon
Flee, get away this is your escape from the nursing home
You're an old man roaming around the forest now
Raise your hands up to heavens, holler out
You're naked!
[Chorus]
Aaaah, I have no teeth in my mouth
Oh, he who hath no teeth in they mouth
Holler out
Scream like a damn wild animal, you're running free
You've got a walker, wobble across the open landscape
Scream out around at anything
That moves or makes a sound
Flee, get away this is your escape from the nursing home
You're an old man roaming around the forest now
Raise your hands up to the heavens, holler out
You're naked!
Feed on the bugs and bite-sized berries that you find
It's a new life, let the moonlight runneth over
Let the earthworms work their way
In and around your toes
Drink from the river, live as one, deliverance comes at a price
Take pride in all your primal light
This is the night you raise your hands to touch the sky
You're naked!
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Sure To Roll:
Old Guilloto
The chicken who's fancy free
With barnyard bravado
La da da da, da da di
Watch him go
His feathers will scatter and float on down
To cover the ground
Farmer Hatchett
He's giving Guilloto his wings
For the wind to catch him
A splendid beheading, you see
Watch him go
His pleasure to lead a revolt
And dance about the town
[Chorus]
Without a head
We're frolicking, fluttering, flying higher
Without a head
We are free
Well I like water
Water likes me
La aqua rosada
La da da da, da da di
Watch him go
His feathers will scatter and float
His pleasure to lead a revolt
When everybody has seen
Their heads are sure to roll
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Maury Povich:
Trailer-park blood descend
We keep it in the family
[Chorus]
Stop breeding
Stop breeding
Baby's daddy can't spell
That DNA doesn't have a chance in hell
Cui bono fat-ass
Do you really want your kids to look like that?
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Electroencephalogram:
TV has rotted my brain
I'm left in a vegetative state, oh yeah
My attention span is just all wrong
I'll be lucky if I get through this fucking song, oh yeah
Hook those wires into my brain
Strap me down before I go insane
[Chorus]
Flat line on my electroencephalogram x2
Blips and flashes are all I see
My brain is tweaked from too much LSD, oh yeah
The serotonin will no longer stick
Another dose of this stuff and I could get sick, oh yeah
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Mustachio:
You'd be hot if you didn't have a mustache
You'd be pretty good-looking without that stache
I imagine a smooth upper-lip and it gives me an erection
You'd be hot if you weren't my dad
You'd be pretty good-looking if we didn't have the same eyes
I imagine looking in the mirror and pressing my lips against myself
Yeah, I know it's a mind-fuck and I can't take it
You'd be hot if you weren't downstairs
I don't mean to be a dick,
but I just think you'd be more attractive if you were upstairs
What the fuck is wrong with that?
You'd be hot if you didn't have the Clapp
You'd be hot if you didn't have an STD
Now I'm reaching out of the cloud and picking one of you out
Coming with me to my golden palace in the sky
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